The idiom came to mind this morning as I finished up the readings from the Daily Office to ‘hear what the spirit’ was saying to me. The phrase appears to have originated in the 30’s – during the depression to reflect the disappointment of missed opportunities due to tardiness and insufficient effort.
I think I’ve been in a kind of depression of my own, a spiritual depression – missing opportunities to be the kind of partner with God I believe I have been called to be. Opportunities missed to be of encouragement to others, to forgive, to ask for forgiveness, to repent. A day late and dollar short. Showing up late with little effort to hear what the Spirit is saying to me – to hear how God is answering my prayers.
You see, my prayers – my conversation with the Lord – over the past few months has been reduced big time (little effort) and primarily ‘me’ focused. “Help me.” “Lead me.” “Change me.” “Show me where I am failing you and so many others.” “Peel back the onion covering my eyes.” “Help me, Lord, Jesus, to see as you see, hear as you hear, know as you know, love as you love, forgive as you forgive.” “HELP!”
In concert with these petitions, I’ve been praying in earnest for a swath of friends and family in need of healing – physical and emotional. Praying for their well-being and at the same time asking how – where – in what way – the Lord would have me help Him advance the healing.
But no sooner do I wrap up my prayers, then I’m off to the next thing on my to-do list for the day, and I’ve let pass the quiet time I need to hear God’s answers, prompts, whispers, nudges. Day late, dollar short.
This past week as I settled down in my home after a summer of here, there, and everywhere, I realized that I had let my daily discipline of praying the Daily Office fall off my radar screen. I swapped out that somewhat time consuming discipline for another, shorter spiritual practice, a daily meditation from 24-7 Prayer, Lectio 365.
In less than fifteen minutes I am paused to be still and dwell on God’s word, prompted to reflect for personal application, and then head into the day with a concluding prayer. And though always thoughtful and applicable, I’ve come to see that – at least in these past summer months – not much stuck. While my prayers increased in intensity – especially for direction, guidance and clarity and for the many friends and family members with significant health challenges – and while the morning reflections were helpful in the early morning moments of any given day, it was often at mid-day when I was in the midst of some activity, that I found myself untethered, unable to connect God-dots in real time. What’s the right way here in this moment? What are the right words? How do I respond in love? Encouragement? Forgiveness? Humility?
This morning I determined to start it out differently. To get back to the spiritual discipline that has helped me through the years to hear what the Lord is saying, see what the Lord is doing, not just in my own life but in the world. Dwelling in the word, God’s word, is where I need to be – anchored in the bay of scripture.
And lo and behold, I showed up for today’s readings on time and with a renewed sense of purpose… and what did the Lord, God have waiting for me? These wise words from the psalter – Psalm One.
1 Happy are they who have not walked in the counsel of
the wicked, *
nor lingered in the way of sinners,
nor sat in the seats of the scornful!2 Their delight is in the law of the Lord, *
and they meditate on his law day and night.3 They are like trees planted by streams of water,
bearing fruit in due season, with leaves that do not wither; *
everything they do shall prosper.4 It is not so with the wicked; *
they are like chaff which the wind blows away.5 Therefore the wicked shall not stand upright when
judgment comes, *
nor the sinner in the council of the righteous.6 For the Lord knows the way of the righteous, *
but the way of the wicked is doomed.
I smiled as I read. Yup – this past summer I’ve been anything but rooted as a tree bearing fruit along a stream, meditating on God’s Word day and night. I’ve been flitting about, squeezing in my prayer time with Him for the fifteen minutes before the day starts and expecting to hear back, asap.
Message received, Lord God. I’m grateful You put it on my heart to get back on track, today. And though I am on the slower side still connecting dots – this reflection posting as the day draws to a close – I’m here – fully present. Listening.
I’m sure You have much to say. I’m all ears.
Praise Him from whom all blessings, flow.
Let us pray:
Father, help me to live this day to the full, being true to you, in every way.
Jesus, help me to give myself away to others, being kind to everyone I meet.
Spirit, help me to love the lost, proclaiming Christ in all I do and say. Amen.
Lectionary: Year 1 Proper 16: Monday:
AM Psalm 1, 2, 3; PM Psalm 4, 7
1 Kings 1:5-31; Acts 26:1-23; Mark 13:14-27
TRINITY SEASONS 