Things are just not the way we see them: Lift your eyes to the Maker to see

Posted on November 20, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

angel

It wasn’t until late in life that I came to believe in Satan as a ‘being’ and not a metaphor, symbol, some imperceivable dark matter or caricature of evil.  Though I had recited for years the baptismal promise to “renounce Satan and all the spiritual forces of wickedness that rebel against God? (BCP 301), I had trouble wrapping my mind about evil embodied in an fallen angel – a real, live being.  And even more confusion when asked to think that this fallen angel ruled earth, was after our human hearts and ambitions – basically thinking that this dark matter had any agency in the world, today.

But I got a grip on the reality of Satan when someone simply pointed out that Jesus had no such confusion.  Jesus knew Satan to be real, to have an agenda, to be feared and to be defeated. Much of Jesus’ ministry while here was spent renouncing Satan – not the idea of Satan – the idea of evil – but Satan, the fallen angel who opposed God.

That turn-around – lens switch, if you will – opened up all sorts of doors for understanding God and God’s will and actions in the world, that I hadn’t been able to before.  A clarity – a focus on one little thing – that Jesus believed Satan to be real and not some head game.

Kind of an odd start for a reflection on today’s gospel, Matthew 18.  But, at the second verse I was paused at a reference Jesus makes to heaven and the angels (I tell you, in heaven their angels continually see the face of my Father in heaven) and I thought about how easy it seems for many to ‘believe’ in angels – know they real – but discard the cast of characters and even the set from which they all come and exist.

Jesus links heaven and angels. He didn’t believe in the idea of angels or the idea of heaven, where his Father lived and from whence he came, anymore than he believed in Satan as an idea.

Believing in angels, and not all the rest – well – though not a bad thing, perhaps a limiting, one-sided, blind-sided even, convenient, comforting and pleasing sort of belief.  If we pick and choose what to believe – or not – out of scripture, out of the life of Jesus Christ – then how do we even begin to comprehend what God has revealed for us, individually, corporately and for the world and apply in our lives?  How do we hold ourselves accountable for things done and left undone?  Is it enough to just ‘believe’ in something – in an idea?  To believe in angels, to believe in God the Creator, to believe in Jesus Christ, but…?  Big picture belief in it all, but details of how it all works and what God has in store for His creation, that stuff has no bearing on how we are to live?

In Lisa Randall’s (Professor of Science at Harvard University) new book,  Dark Matter and the Dinosaurs: The Astounding Interconnectedness of the Universe, a similar question is posed.  Dark Matter is matter that does not interact with light, more like transparent matter than dark, actually.  But cosmologists, astronomers, physicists now believe that dark matters is perhaps 85 percent of the matter in the universe.

They now believe what was always so, is.  They believe what is not observable, is.  Hmm.

The seen and the unseen.  This is what Christians declare in the Nicene Creed,

We believe in one God,
the Father, the Almighty,
maker of heaven and earth,
of all that is, seen and unseen.

I think this includes not only dark matter – but angels, heaven, where our Father sits, and Satan, too.  Things are not just the way we see – or choose to believe or not – but the way they are – the way they were made by our God.  I am grateful for the recitation of the creed every week in worship if only for this simple reminder – the seen and unseen. The reminder of that profound truth helps me see differently – prompting me to lift my eyes at any given moment to see what God sees, not what I see.

Such a reminder came to Lisa Randall, not in the form of a creed, but in scientific observation and it had a profound impact on the way she investigates the world.  As she explained in a recent radio interview

…only about five percent of the energy in the universe is ordinary matter, whereas 25 percent is dark matter. I find that remarkable. I mean why isn’t it (dark matter) a tiny, tiny fraction? And the fact that we don’t see it — I mean, why should everything interact with light? The fact that we interact with light …It’s a kind of mistake people make all the time. We think we overcame that with the Copernican Revolution. We have a more open perspective. But we still have to get it knocked into our heads every time that things are not just the way we see them in our daily lives. 

I’m thankful for the reminder today from the gospel that Jesus knew all things to be what they were – knew our Father in heaven, knew the angels were there watching out over all of us, especially our little ones, knew Satan was real and to be renounced, knew life eternal was to be for all who believe…in all.

Praise Him.

Friday Lectionary Readings: AM Psalm 102; PM Psalm 107:1-32
1 Macc. 4:36-59; Rev. 22:6-13; Matt. 18:10-20

 

 

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Head in the clouds, hearing with my heart

Posted on November 16, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

 

Matthew 17:5 While he was still speaking, suddenly a bright cloud overshadowed them, and from the cloud a voice said, “This is my Son, the Beloved; with him I am well pleased; listen to him!” 6 When the disciples heard this, they fell to the ground and were overcome by fear. 7 But Jesus came and touched them, saying, “Get up and do not be afraid.” 8 And when they looked up, they saw no one except Jesus himself alone.

Cloud of WitnessesI hear God in a few of places. In worship, in yoga class, in music, and in the clouds. Not the big booming voice of God that Matthew describes in today’s gospel, but from inside out – a nudge, a thought, a feeling.  And when I do – hear with my heart – I am not afraid, as Jesus assures Peter, James, and John.

This morning as I was reading, I was listening to this piece by French pianist Andre Gagnon titled “Like the First Day.” The combination of the music, God’s word and the image of the clouds of witnesses – well that trinity of sensations, if you will, moved me to tears and even made my heart ache just a little.   Such a beautiful thing – the power of feeling, of knowing God’s presence with the heart.  I thought of the folks in Paris – wondered how – if – they felt God’s presence in the midst of the anger, chaos, slaughter.  Heart-ache.  It is a feeling, not a thought.

Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D. brain scientist and stroke survivor (My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientists’s Personal Journeystroke of insight) says that our brains reveal human beings are feeling creatures who think, not thinking creatures who feel, as most moderns assert. Feelings have gotten a bad rap – discounted as reptilian – in the rational, information, scientific observation age in which we live.

Feeling creatures who think. Think about that.

So many of God’s people in therapy sessions, in how-to classes, climbing ladders, explaining this, researching that, spending so much time in the head, trying to think themselves through life and into a feeling – a feeling of happiness, success, a good life.

Hmm.

True, we can’t live out of only our feelings. What a mess that life would be.  But, identifying the places you hear God, where you are moved, where you feel God’s presence, where something on the outside speaks to you from the inside – well that is a good place to start any day.

How do you hear God?

Praise Him.

Lectionary Readings: AM Psalm 89:1-18; PM Psalm 89:19-52
1 Macc. 3:1-24; Rev. 20:7-15; Matt. 17:1-13

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Trials, Paths, God’s plans and delight in being where I am to be

Posted on October 16, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

Psalm 16: 1 Protect me, O God, for I take refuge in you; *
I have said to the Lord, “You are my Lord,
my good above all other.”

2 All my delight is upon the godly that are in the land, *
upon those who are noble among the people.

Paused right off the bat this morning at the psalm and I haven’t made my way through the remainder of today’s reading so in awe I am of the power of God’s Word to protect me, remind me that I AM in God’s hands.  To let go, to look around at where I am, and to let God do with me what He intends.  My story but His glory.  God in control.

I have been in a long, long season of trial.  When the trial first came to me – rather, when I first awakened to the truth that I was in a season of trial – it looked to me to have a shelf life of maybe a couple of years.  An end.  I remembering thinking – and praying – that if I could get through this very rough patch and get back to path the Lord, God had intended me to be upon all along – well then, this rough patch season would fade.  I’d look back at it and delight that I had made it through and give thanks and glory to God for getting me through, and well…all would be well.

Hmm.  My thoughts, my best made, plans.  God laughs at those, you know.your-plan_Gods-plan

We all have our battles, our trials.  Some come and go, others persist and seem to have no end. Chronic pain vs a bum knee that can be repaired through surgery, for example. Memory loss vs loss of a loved one.  Paul’s thorn vs Job’s loss of life as he knew it.  Trials all. Though the nature different, chronic and on-going or seasonal, as children of God – we are encouraged and commanded, even, to go to God for the way through.  To let go, and let God. To find God in the mix where we children of God have to trust His presence in this mess.  God is there, in the trial, valley, chronic or otherwise, positioned to teach us, lead us through, by His hand (the circumstances that conspire in one way or another) and by His Word (what is revealed to us in scripture) – to make us stronger through our weakness, our trial.

Ok.  So I have been making my way through.  And of late I have felt like I had  – made it through. Things were coming together and the rough patch was behind me, and I was just glimpsing the finish line.  It was in view.  I sensed the road beneath my feet was the one God wanted me upon. I was beginning to brave a look backwards looking at the valley I had made it through and climbed out of and thinking it was behind me.

Then.  Just last night as I was doing a mundane thing mapping out my calendar for the coming months to align with this path I thought I was on, I was jolted by a notice that what I thought was going to take just under a year to complete, was in fact going to require another two years. Ha! I could almost hear my Lord, God laughing.  Not a mean-spirited laugh – more like a chuckle, ‘Oh my, my dear one.  No, you are not through the trial. You haven’t gotten back to the straight road, yet.  My time, loved one, my time.  Not yours.’

I didn’t panic.  I didn’t overthink.  I just took the sweet chuckle of God’s laugh with me to bed, readjusting in my head the calendar and list of things to do – short term, and long. And I just prayed to let me sleep.  To let me know that I was trusting Him and letting go by bringing me rest.

And I did.  Sleep. And then this morning, I woke to this very reassuring word from the Lord.

1 Protect me, O God, for I take refuge in you; *
I have said to the Lord, “You are my Lord,
my good above all other.”

hugging-pooh-coloring-pageI don’t hear God chuckling this morning. I just feel His love. Kind of like Tigger here hugging Pooh Bear. I am comforted.

And I trust that His way for me is taking so much darn time for a reason.  After all, the shortest distance between two points – between birth and death – is a straight line.  This crooked-detour-thwarted-land-mined path I have been put upon has given me, gifted me, blessed me with time – more time.

God’s time.  Not mine.  God’s plans.  Not mine.

Praise Him.

Friday Lectionary Readings:

AM Psalm 16, 17; PM Psalm 22
Jer. 38:14-28; 1 Cor. 15:1-11; Matt. 11:1-6

 

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One, two, Buckle my shoe… Three, four, Open the door… Five, six, Pick up sticks

Posted on October 10, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

Jeremiah 35:18 But to the house of the Rechabites Jeremiah said: Thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel: Because you have obeyed the command of your ancestor Jonadab, and kept all his precepts, and done all that he commanded you, 19therefore thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel: Jonadab son of Rechab shall not lack a descendant to stand before me for all time.

Do you recall what the Rechabites did?  What commands they obeyed?  Just two things. They didn’t drink wine. And didn’t live in houses, just tents. Serioulsly?  This is what the Lord, God holds up for the gold standard for those whose blood line will continue through time?

News flash, the Rechabites have survived through time; in the Christian world there’s a group who abstain from alcohol and call themselves the Independent Order of Rechabites;  in the Muslim world many consider the Rechahbites their ancestors; and tribes living near the Dead Sea and in Yemen claim descendency from the Rechabites.

But survival of the line is not the story here – at least as a biblical story and in terms of causality. Cause and effect. Did they receive God’s grace because they didn’t drink wine and lived in tents?

Is it a particular command that is obeyed that is important?  Is that what the Holy Spirit is saying to God’s people today?  Don’t drink.  Live in tents, not homes?  Or are we being taught something about obedience, in general.  About the connection between God’s grace and obedience.

It is easy to be distracted by the particularities found in scripture in lieu of the universal. All the stories of the bible are filled with particularities.  Indeed it is the presence of particular people, particular geography, particular gender, particular food, particular times of day, years, etc., that provides access to and teaches one aspect, dimension, color of a universal truth.   But. The particularities are not the story – the whole story.  The particularities contribute to the story. Give it a particular flavor.

I think focusing in on particular ‘don’t’s of scripture is like constructing a faith-based life picking up the least encumbered lowest valued color stick in a pick up stick game.  garden-games-giant-pick-up-sticksIn the photo here, it would be like picking up the green ones on the outside.

You know the childhood game.  A number of sticks are thrown out  on the ground and each player has a chance to pick up as many as they are able without moving the other sticks.  And each color has a value.  And there’s one stick you really want to avoid moving – or get to before the others.  The caution to not move other sticks  – especially the single colored one –  can be paralyzing and limiting.  It is easier to remove unencumbered, though less valued sticks and often on the perimeter of the pile, than to reach for the stars and go after the buried single colored stick slowly but surely perhaps even losing a turn every time something is moved with the effort.

Not drinking wine, not living in a house – well these seem like sticks of less value and on the perimeter of the life God created for us.  Maybe it works for some, and apparently it did for the Rechabites – but surely God’s people are in that messy pile of sticks, too, and are invited to live in it.

God creates this big, crazy wonderful pick up stick world.  We get to play in it and if we follow the rules – if we obey – we win.  God is happy camper, and so are we.  Playing by the rules – don’t move the other sticks or you lose your turn – is the big idea.  But how do we play?  How then, are we to live? Are we paralyzed with the fear of making a mistake and so we attach ourselves to ‘doable’ rules, biblical particularities – don’t drink, live in a tent – and hang out there on the outside looking into the mess of the pile?

Or do we take some risks – trust that to give God the greatest glory we obey the rules – take our turn and take our chances at losing our turn – but get right in the mix.  Get into the life God has thrown out for us to play in?

Lectionary Readings Saturday:

AM Psalm 137:1-6(7-9), 144; PM Psalm 104
Jer. 35:1-19; 1 Cor. 12:27-13:3; Matt. 9:35-10:4

 

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Teeter Tottering – Believing is Seeing, Seeing is Believing

Posted on October 9, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

 

Matthew 9:28When he entered the house, the blind men came to him; and Jesus said to them, ‘Do you believe that I am able to do this?’ They said to him, ‘Yes, Lord.’ 29Then he touched their eyes and said, ‘According to your faith let it be done to you.’ 30And their eyes were opened. Then Jesus sternly ordered them, ‘See that no one knows of this.’ 31But they went away and spread the news about him throughout that district.

I was paused at two words in today’s gospel reading, ‘sternly ordered,’  perhaps because that kind of admonishment coming from Jesus on the heels of a healing just feels wrong. A sense of shame is suggested which feels entirely awkward and inappropriate. Isn’t healing a good thing – good news?

I was curious about the frequency with which the adverbial clause ‘sternly ordered’ was used in scripture and found 25 instances.

The exact wording occurs only in the synoptic gospels.  And nearly all of the admonitions come from Jesus, directly.  When said by Jesus, it is only in two situations:  either when a healing has been performed or when with the disciples he self-identifies as the Son of Man, the messiah.

In each instance where ‘sternly ordered‘ is said by Jesus after a healing – well, the order is disobeyed.  That is, after Jesus sternly orders the healed person not to say anything, the word ‘BUT’ follows and the healed person disobeys and tells all.  So ‘…sternly ordered, but….’ is the way it unfolds in most of the healing stories found in the synoptic gospels.

Where the command is obeyed is in the instances that have to do with Jesus’ identity and what is to come.  In several instances, Jesus sternly orders his disciples not to share the good news of the kingdom come.  They are insiders who are told to keep the good news under wraps.  Hmm.

So, blind faith leads to sight and that good news trumps the command to mums the word. Once the feathers are released from the pillow, they can’t be stuffed back.  All for everyone to see. When Jesus heals, that’s just the truth of the matter.

But the disciples held their tongue about Jesus.  That truth wasn’t released like feathers. Instead, they held onto to the pillow believing they knew what was inside, but too scared to release – maybe because they had some doubts. Perhaps they had to see it to believe it – had to experience Jesus as the resurrected Son of God in order to know through every cell of their being that he was who he said he was, who they thought he was, who they wanted to believe he was. The disciples walked most closely with Jesus.  Saw the miracles. The healings. The compassion. The forgiveness. They saw it all. But…

I think I was paused at ‘sternly ordered‘ in order to think more deeply about belief and sight and how these manifest in my walk.

To believe in Jesus, is to see Jesus in all things.  And to see Jesus in all things, is to believe  – to have faith – that wherever I am, whatever trial I am experiencing – whatever illness, brokenness, blessing – Jesus is with me each step of the way.  I have to believe to see this – to see God’s hand upon me, leading me, whispering – but more than I’d like to admit, I have to see it to really believe it.

seesawThere’s a sort of ying and yang to the idea of believing is seeing and seeing is believing.  A teeter-totter is what comes to mind. At any given time I am on one end of the spectrum, then whooops…there I am up in the air on the other end.  Like the blind men, I believe so I see God in the mix really clearly one day, but then the next I am up in the air, in the clouds, confused about everything and wondering why God doesn’t make himself known…let me see you in this mix, God, so I can believe I am on the right track!

I think all believers teeter totter back and forth between the blind faith and trust of the blind men and the ‘seeing is believing’ faith of the disciples.

Do you know what the other word for teeter-totter is?  Seesaw.  Yup.  SEE SAW.  The See Saw of lifeOn one end of the belief spectrum I SEE God, I believe so I SEE…and on the other end, like the disciples who SAW it as it was happening – who SAW the kingdom come and so they believed.

It helps to be reminded that no matter where I am on the SEESAW of life, God’s faith waivers not, is no such seesaw.  Rather God’s faith in me is at the center…that little triangle – trinity – you see in the illustration to the right.  God’s faith in me is there – at the center. Steadfast and at the core of who I am.

Praise Him.

 

Lectionary Readings Friday:

AM Psalm 140, 142; PM Psalm 141, 143:1-11(12)
2 Kings 23:36-24:17; 1 Cor. 12:12-26; Matt. 9:27-34

 

 

 

 

 

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Hanging 10 God’s way through

Posted on October 5, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

Book_of_Exodus_Chapter_15-7_(Bible_Illustrations_by_Sweet_Media)Psalm 106:9 He rebuked the Red Sea, and it dried up, *
and he led them through the deep as through a desert.

I like this image and never ever tire of being reminded of the truth embodied in it- the juxtaposition of

  • DEEP as in ocean floor deep
  • VALLEY , the valley made by two walls of the deep looming on either side and conjuring the picture of the valley of death ‘though I walk through the valley of death’
  • DESERT as in the place where Jesus went to pray.

Add to these images the action of God – ‘…he led them through….’

God leads us through troubled zones, crisis times, health scares, insurmountable prison walls. God makes a way, creates a path, opens a door, forges a crevice…THROUGH, not over, not around, not back.  No do-overs.  No return to the state of being before the troubled zone, the health or relational crisis, the imprisonment, the revelation of a heartbreak.

God is the architect, the TripAdvisor, the Google Map camera- making a way for us through trouble. But getting through is wholly dependent on our trusting God – trusting that we are meant to go through this particular trial and recognizing that we have no means to avoid it. We can’t think our way out, over, or around.  And we can’t go back as a way of avoiding going through. To  move forward through is trusting that the road was carved out, mapped out, for us by God who loves us.  We were led to this intersection of crisis and faith for a reason.

God is in this – whatever your ‘this’ is – in the way through.

And when we trust His way, who’s to say that way through is all doom and gloom, grim and desert like.  Dan Piraro’s comic strip yesterday, Bizarro, brought a smile.  surfing red seaMade me realize and appreciate and think about our FUN-loving God.  Perhaps some ways through are fun – maybe joyful, maybe willy-nilly free spirited.  What a blessing Piraro’s illustration brought to me.  When I trust God’s way through, I just might find myself riding a really good wave.

Praise Him.

Lectionary Readings: AM Psalm 106:1-18; PM Psalm 106:19-48
2 Kings 21:1-18; 1 Cor. 10:14-11:1; Matt. 8:28-34

 

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Walk the walk by faith…by His POWER

Posted on September 21, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

1 Corinthians 4: 20For the kingdom of God depends not on talk but on power.

Walk by Faith

Power is an interesting concept[1].  There is economic power, political power, positional power, military power, legal power, sexual power, parental power, and Spiritual power. The public ministry of Jesus was a type of ‘power encounter’ between two kingdoms – kingdom of darkness – Satan, demonic oppression and the Kingdom of God.  Jesus was reversing the kingdom of darkness (I John 3:8 The Son of God was revealed for this purpose, to destroy the works of the devil).

Generally speaking, people recognize and respond to power.  In fact,  Simon the Sorcerer in Acts 8 saw the power demonstrated by the ministry of Peter and offered to buy the power (ability) with money, which of course was not for sale.

One of the reasons Jesus was killed was because Temple leadership was threatened by his power.  Recall that after Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, (John 11:45-47) many witnesses who saw that power demonstrated believed.  But others   went back to Jerusalem and plotted how to kill him.

When Jesus passed on the ministry of the Kingdom to the twelve, and then later to the Luke 10,  he passed on power ministry:  heal the sick, cast out the demons, forgive sins ,bring good news.  Eventually the ministry was given to the CHURCH – to us – to continue to minister in power and deliver all who were oppressed of the devil:

Acts 10: 38how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power; how he went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with him.

The reason I like Johannes Blumhardt so much (Blumhardt is best known for his contribution in thought towards a kingdom-now or kingdom-come theology; a perennial breaking-in of God’s kingdom from the future helped transform Christian eschatology in the twentieth century) is because he makes a very simple conclusion : when the church fails to minister in power, fails to demonstrate the power of God and impact broken humanity  it loses RELEVANCE – people don’t care – the message is only words, rhetoric – no matter how powerfully delivered with bells, whistles, music and lights – words without substance.

In today’s passage, Paul is reflecting on his attempt to intellectualize the gospel on Mars Hill in Athens – all persuasion – eloquence – debate – most probably a lively one.  But it had no demonstration of the power of God and Paul concluded that proclamation without demonstration falls short.  Recall that no church was ever established in Athens.

Seminarians receive a lot of training in proclamation, in intellectualizing the gospel, formatting a debate,  and very  little training, exposure and theology to affirm the power of the kingdom – not just power in signs and wonders, but how to use power to heal and transform.  The power to love enemies, power to forgive, power to bless, power to give, power to embrace the Beatitudes ‘blessed are you when poor in spirit, hunger and thirst after righteousness, persecuted, reviled.’

Jesus ministered in power – gave the power to us through the Holy Spirit so we could demonstrate the kingdom not just preach it.   Jesus trained and taught disciples to pray and to heal.  The power to turn away from evil, the power to love – all action, all walk.

We are each called to live in the power of the Holy Spirit – as is God’s church.  Are you?  Is your church?

[1] The reflection today is a mixture of comments from a dialogue I had with a colleague about a shared sense that transformative power of the Holy Spirit is hard to come by from the pulpit, only or primarily. We were reflecting on the proliferation of entertainment pseudo-churches where the power of a “word” is elevated above the sacrament and we wondered if there’s any power to sustain these bodies as God’s church over time.

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Here’s talking to you, kid…dwell

Posted on March 9, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

At the Episcopal parish where I have been worshiping this Lenten season, the priest has been including a prayer from Thomas Merton at the conclusion of the Eucharist and before dismissing all of God’s people into the world to do the work God gives us to do.

The prayer is an appropriate addition in this liturgical season of Lent when regularly worshiping Christians re-engage with their faith on a practical, life-lived level for 40 days, replicating some of the disciplines first century Christians instituted in what was a period of preparation for baptism into God’s church. A period considered a journey, amongst other things – a journey of re-orientation, penitence, reflection, a journey of getting one’s life set on the right path, re-orientated towards God and away from self. A journey begun in the desert, alone, but knowing God’s presence there, trusting His hand to lead you out, lift the fog, nudge you towards Him.

This prayer, A Prayer for Guidance, speaks to this one aspect of a Lenten journey, elevating the yearning for simply knowing God’s presence, soft-ball pitching the question of whether or not we are on the right path and are we doing the right thing?

My Lord God,

I have no idea where I am going.
I do not sense the road ahead of me.
Nor do I really know myself,

And the fact that I think I am following your will
Does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you
Does in fact please you.
And I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this,
You will lead me by the right road
Though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always,
Though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.

I will not fear, for you are ever with me,
And you will never leave me to face my struggles alone.

The prayer has hung around my head this Lenten season like a dense fog, fog-with-green-field-pixabay-fog-4237_640hovering above and under and within my comings and goings penetrating the nooks and crannies of my own prayers, of worship and of the Daily Office readings.

And this morning, the prayer lifted. That is to say, the fog lifted. RoadTrip_Aug2011_24For at one word in the Old Testament reading, I paused and my eyes lifted. Ahhh…the Holy Spirit arrived! I have yearned for some such touch for so long now. Just a touch to let me know all is not lost – that I am not lost and that I haven’t lost touch with the Lord.

It is when my eyes lift from reading something, especially Scripture, that I have come to know as an interruption of sorts, a pause button wherein God wants to be heard. Something is headed my way that I need to pay attention to – some learning, some thought, some answer – that God intends me to heed.

So, this pause, eyes lifted, was like a whispered answer to the petition expressed in A Prayer for Guidance.

Isn’t it lovely how the Holy Spirit can elevate just a word – one word – to bring someone ‘a word’ (which is insider talk for a message, a nugget, a piece of advice, encouragement, a plan, a prayer answered).  If you dwell in God’s Word you’ll find that just one of them is often all it takes to let you know God’s talkin’ to you, kid.

Dwell. That was the word meant for me today.  Dwell.

Read what God is saying to God’s people in Jeremiah 7. He is talking about a contract of sorts – if you do this, then I will do that. This is the covenant. You worship me, the Lord your God, and follow the law as best you can as I have laid out and I will be with you always.  Steadfast love, faithfulness, hope is yours from me, your Lord, God, who dwells with you in this place, in this life, in this moment…in all places, all lives, all time.

5 For if you truly amend your ways and your doings, if you truly act justly one with another, 6if you do not oppress the alien, the orphan, and the widow, or shed innocent blood in this place, and if you do not go after other gods to your own hurt, 7then I will dwell with you in this place, in the land that I gave of old to your ancestors for ever and ever.

Now I believe God is present in all things – in ALL – time, space, genes, the planets, humanity, relationships. God’s presence is in all blessings, in all sufferings. Point is, that I have never been challenged to wonder if God is in all things – a gift of faith from the Lord, God – but rather where God’s presence can be felt, seen, known so that His will, path, way, can be discerned and followed.

And in my personal life this has been one of the biggest of all challenges  – just not having a clue far too many times whether or not I am where God wants me or where I want me. God is in the mix – never a doubt about that – but it has been more than difficult to move forward one way or another as various apparent roadblocks and detours pop up, confusing me, immobilizing me, distancing me from God’s still small voice.  Have I walked the way God laid out for me or have I gone down too many wrong roads?  And why I am so confused, still, yet, evermore? As the prayer, says:

I do not sense the road ahead of me.
Nor do I really know myself,

And the fact that I think I am following your will
Does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you
Does in fact please you

So. Hmmm. Dwell.

What is the Spirit saying to me? Why was the fog lifted here? Is there a difference between just knowing God is in all things and in dwelling in that truth?

Is it possible that that the chances for receiving an an answer to prayer, of perceiving God’s hand, or hearing a word, are immensely improved by simply dwelling? By practicing my faith? Dwelling in the Word. Worshiping regularly. Doing my best to obey, to do justice, to love my neighbor, to visit the prisoner?

And if God is dwelling in me, then can I have the courage to accept that though I feel lost and confused as the Merton prayer describes, I am where God would have me be. God is leading me.

I do.  Have the courage. To accept that I am where God would have me.  And I praise God for lifting the fog this morning long enough for me to see all the little hints laid out for me the past few months – the little whispers of encouragement to stay on the path that I was set upon – to trust Him, to breathe in His Word, to give thanks for all God has brought my way  – roadblocks, thwarts and all – so that I might do good works and live a life that glorifies only Him.

Dwell.  Linger here, longer, loved one.  The fog will clear.

Praise Him.

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Clouds of Witnesses – Only Jesus

Posted on February 6, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

God speaks to us from a cloud

Here is my Son

Love where you are

Know wherever you go, you are  homeTransfiguration CloudDaily Lectionary Readings February 6, 2014:

AM Psalm 69:1-23(24-30)31-38; PM Psalm 73
Isa. 56:1-8; Gal. 5:16-24; Mark 9:2-13

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Jesus can you save me from going crazy

Posted on February 5, 2015 by Trinity Seasons

Lee Ann Womack’s song, Send it on Down, isn’t my story but like any story that speaks to the human condition and one’s relationship with the Lord, God, it sure hits home.  

I heard this song for the first time just last week as I was cleaning up my office re-shelving text, commentary and reference books I had taken with me for an off-site theology written exam. Re-shelving books that represented a season in my life I thought, at one time, would have landed me in a different place and space – like the different town in Womack’s song.

I took a moment with each book fondly recalling the teaching, the revelations and epiphanies that had come my way from the pages of these books – from the writings and musings, prayers and words of others – wondering what in the world was next.  And how could it be that I was still here?  And what was I to do with all that had been revealed and that I had learned.  And why, now that this work was complete, why was I feeling so alone, and lost, and needing to be found? Needing help from above. Needing a sign. A touch. A whisper.  Help from above.

The laptop perched on my desk was tuned to a country music video show providing what I thought would be an easy going sound track to the emotionally-packed task at hand.  I wasn’t watching the videos – just listening and bopping around the room to the country-western rhythm, even dancing a bit – behaving myself out of the lost-woe-is-me-place I felt I was in. Trying to feel in my bones the gratitude I had for having completed my studies. Trying to not wonder why anymore and just be – be here and now, in the moment, grateful with open ears and eyes and heart to God’s touch.

It came by way of Womack’s song.  Jesus can you save me? I stopped dancing.  Moved to the desk to see the video.  Sat down. Watched in order to hear more deeply. My prayer – this had been my prayer for most of my life, long. Was it still?

There was something so sad in the voice – not hopeful, and not even close to joyful as talk of Jesus and salvation is meant to be.  Simply sad.  And the prayer-like lyrics compelled me to sit with this woman.  To be in the here and now, in the moment. To pray with her.

Click this link to see the version I watched Send it on Down, by Lee Ann Womack as performed acoustically on CMT.

I hear in Womack’s voice the pain of one who knows they are in over their head and need help from above to get out before they are completely lost. I hear the familiar pain of deep loneliness, too. As I watch her sing the song, I weep. Such a private moment, a private prayer from her heart.  No one knows the pain she is in, no one knows how crazy she feels, how close she is to losing it all.  Find me, the woman in the song prays – find me, Jesus.

And it asks for more. Don’t just find me, do something about it!  Like many prayers of those who are lost, the song-prayer asks for Jesus to take the initiative,  – to take some action – to send her something that will get her out of the bog. She knows she doesn’t have it in her to do, herself. Save me – send me something.

I wonder what Jesus will send her? And I wonder what she expects? Does she even know what she is asking for?

I wonder if she will hear it, experience it, see it, know it, feel it, follow it.

I’ve written about this before – about our prayers to the Lord, God, to save us from one thing or another.  I’m intrigued about the authenticity of such prayers.  Jesus save me from going crazy. Ok.  But.  Is this an honest prayer if I am unwilling to change myself?  My circumstance? Are we honestly praying for Jesus to save us from ourselves – to keep us on track, to love as we are loved, to forgive as we are forgiven – when we choose to ignore all the help He does send our way.

This is the tricky part.  You know you are in trouble. You seek Jesus. You trust you will be saved. And days, months, years later you find yourself in the same town, singing the same song, hoping Jesus will finally find you before it’s too late.

Just what God was saying to His people through Isaiah in today’s Old Testament reading of the daily lectionary.  Find me – come to me, before it’s too late.

6 Seek the Lord while he may be found,
call upon him while he is near;

7 let the wicked forsake their way,

and the unrighteous their thoughts;
let them return to the Lord, that he may have mercy on them,
and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.

Apparently, before its too late works both ways.  Just as the woman in Womack’s song knows she needs to be found quick, our Lord God, warns the Israelites that time is running out for them to find Him.  The woman of the song seeks to be sought, relocated, helped, saved.  And God seeks to be sought in order to do just that.  To be known by us, to be praised, to be relocated to, to rest in, to help, to save.

And in the Isaiah passage, we might infer that there’s a time-date stamp associated with God’s offer to save.  Call upon Him while He is near, it reads – as if God is not always near.

God is always near, is always in all things, is always helping, is always saving.  But we are not always within earshot – we distance ourselves from Him, sometimes intentionally, so that we don’t hear and can’t see what He has sent from above.

I wonder if Jesus didn’t send me something from above when this song came across my radar screen.  Did he find me where he would have me? In my office, surrounded by God’s word and books written about our abba Father?  Hmm.  I wonder.

I’m not sure, yet.  But I do know that in that moment – and for that day –  that song and those lyrics, saved me from going crazy.

Praise, Him.

 

 

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